How to Give Criticism

How to give criticism

Gordon Allport believed that when we criticize someone, we are, in a way, performing surgery on their personality — much like a surgeon removing a tumor from a patient's body, who is careful during the operation not to damage the healthy blood vessels and tissue surrounding the tumor!

So when we pick up the scalpel of criticism, we should cut only the part that needs to be cut, and be careful with the healthy parts of the person's character.

For example, when you want to criticize someone for a lack of responsibility, you shouldn't use phrases like “I'm completely disappointed in you” or “You'll never amount to anything,” which call the person's entire character into question. You should first mention the person's good qualities, and only then bring up your criticism.

For example: “You're usually very attentive to me, but it would have been great if you'd remembered today that we have guests coming and you needed to arrive earlier.”

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